A Week In My Life

Monday

I started Monday off in Revolver, the Australian version of Revolution De Cuba. The well-known Dr Banana was DJing for eight hour straight and, as you can imagine, the repetitive, syncopated beat hypnotised everyone in the room — transforming the local youths into a wide-eyed cult who are only able express themselves through gunfingers and aggressive head bopping.

I woke up feeling surprisingly alright — well enough to power through a five-hour shift. I really enjoy working at the pub; my colleagues are lovely, and I’ve grown close to quite a few of them. After my shift, I stayed a little while longer to do some admin (naturally doing anything but), then returned home to watch The Hunger Games with my housemates, and settled into a restful sleep.

Tuesday

Tuesday was an early start. Frey and I have a membership at our local gym for just £30 a month, so we’ve been bashing out Pilates classes. We met our friend Alice at the tram stop and headed to reformer Pilates together. Before coming to Australia, I’d never done reformer Pilates, and I was severely underprepared for how hard it would be. So as a post-class reward, we grabbed a coffee at a local café and sat outside nattering for a while — one of my favourite pastimes.

After seeing the barren sight of my fridge shelf, I went on a food shop with Freya and Immy. Looking at supermarket prices is a shock to the system; everything appears to cost double what it does in the UK, even though the exchange rate is actually half. In light of this, Frey and I make a fun day out of dividing Ubers and shared items by four, which makes everything feel cheaper than it really is.

When we got home, I had a rejuvenating power nap to revive myself for Alice’s birthday party. On par with the whimsical theme, cushions were dotted around the faux grass and long-stemmed colourful candles had been placed on a range of decorated wooden tables spread round the garden. Mediterranean food in quaint dishes were laid out in an organised spread at the back of the garden, inviting everyone to help themselves. Sangria was getting passed around, and upbeat house music seeped out from the speakers. We ended the night with cup of tea and a gossip in our living room with our two mates from work.

Wednesday

After a looooong sleep, I woke up to the sun shining through my windows. As heavenly as this sounds, I’ve had a real issue with the bright sunlight and tweeting birds waking me up at 6am. I’ve taken to stuffing jumpers under the blinds and using noise-cancelling earplugs so I can wake up past this hour.

With a spring in my step, I made breakfast and sat outside with my housemates, the smell of bins wafting into my mouth as I ate. We’ve completely forgotten to take the bins out for the last three weeks, so our courtyard has been buzzing with flies recently, which has been disrupting our tanning sessions.

In the afternoon, we headed to the Australian Open — one of the world’s biggest tennis championships, involving the best players in the world. The tournament takes place at Melbourne Park across 39 courts, with matches spread out over two weeks. We went to see the One Point Slam, a knock-out style exhibition game designed to warm up the crowd and build excitement. The park felt like a little tennis village, with bars and food huts dotted around the courts. Patches of green faux grass added to the atmosphere, with adults sprawled on deckchairs watching matches on big screens while kids hit swingballs nearby.

The One Point Slam was incredible. We watched 48 players battle it out, including world champions, recent qualifiers, and even celebrities with no tennis experience. Among them were Jannik Sinner, Carlos Alcaraz, Coco Gauff, Naomi Osaka, and Nick Kyrgios. The stakes were high, with one million dollars up for grabs.

The quick turnaround of each match was engaging, and the competitors really played up to the crowd, making the audience laugh and shout. The eventual winner was an amateur player who managed to beat multiple world champions on his way to victory. If you’re in Melbourne in January, I’d definitely recommend going to the Aus Open!

Thursday

Thursday was a sociable day. Frey and I clicked with a sweet girl named Hannah at the party on Tuesday, and we met her that morning for a coffee and a natter in Fitzroy. This vibrant area is buzzing with trendy-looking locals and packed full of cafés, vintage shops and bars. Street art covers every possible surface, with not a plain wall in sight.

When we returned to our sublet, we decided to watch the entirety of Maze Runner — oh, the luxury of watching a film in the middle of the afternoon! With our minds racing from the film’s finale and our bodies still in fight-or-flight mode, we headed to a hot Pilates class. This was one of the hardest we’ve done in a while, and our entire bodies hurt the next day.

Later, we headed to Frank’s for dinner — a weekly tradition we very much look forward to. He whipped up a masterpiece: fish tacos with lemony guacamole, sautéed black beans, chopped tomatoes, yoghurt, and caramelised onions and peppers. We had a fat debrief and topped the night off with a bowl of Connoisseur ice cream — the Aussie equivalent of Häagen-Dazs.

Friday

On Friday, we laid low. After a lie-in, we put The Office on and were glued to the sofa for a good few hours. Frey and I have developed the same laugh since being here. We cackle in pronounced unison, mimicking the typical, ‘Ha Ha Ha’ of staccato comic book laughter. We’ve spent too much time together.

We later ran to the closest big supermarket to get toilet roll and soap, two household essentials that we’d been putting off buying for a little too long, before I headed to hot yoga. I was planning on having a quiet night in, but got called into work a 7-12, which I was actually very relieved about as I’ve been spending a little too much recently. Frey was already working that evening, bartending in the function room for a 30th birthday party. Originally scheduled in to do a floor shift, I managed to hop behind the bar with her and we were jigging our shoulders and singing along to a range of old bangers played by the guests.

Sweet Caroline came on and, much to my surprise, the crowd went just as wild as drunk Brits do at football games. The floor was shaking as the large group of adults jumped up and down, arms around each other, with carefree smiles on their faces. Frey and I had our own little moment behind the bar, hopping in circles and belting out the lyrics in out-of-tune unison.

Saturday

I woke up to one of the hottest days in a while and idiotically decided to go for a run. I hadn’t quite realised how hot it was until I stepped out the door and was hit by a wave of heat. Melbourne is more dry than humid, making the air feel oven-hot rather than sticky.

Even so, I managed 4km in the boiling heat. It was hard, as shown by my tomato-red face which didn’t cool down for at least three hours. This was likely not helped by my decision to sunbathe in our backyard, keeping me at the same uncomfortable temperature until I had a long, cold shower.

I headed to work later that evening — a normal colour and temperature, ready to earn my Saturday paycheck. Hospitality pay is so much better than in the UK, with rates increasing on both Saturday and Sunday, and also after 7pm. It was a good shift with good people.

Sunday

I went to my first ever boxing class! Liv and I had been joking for ages about how weak our punches would be, so we finally went — with brunch as an incentive. Although we giggled all the way through at our own expense, I thoroughly enjoyed the class and will definitely go again.

Afterwards, we met Bea and Frey for coffee, but had to leave early because Frey had an allergic reaction — probably from sharing her kimchi and cheese toastie after Bea had eaten peanut butter… no one’s pointing fingers. Side note: Frey is fine!

Once recuperated, we enjoyed a two-man sunbathing session at Carlton pools which is a convenient ten-minute walk from our house. Laid out on the lawn we heard a commotion and saw that everyone was standing around the pool, which had been completely evacuated. As I was leaving, I noticed a chipotle-size brown shape at the far end of the water. A child had pooed in the public pool. I don’t think I’m going back there for a while.

That evening, I worked until close. It felt like a satisfying end to a busy week.